top of page
  • Writer's pictureGladys Agwai


“All endings are a chance to rest, to breathe, to reflect on the conclusion of a journey in preparation for a new one.”

Nature shows us that every beginning has an ending, and all endings a new beginning. Tides

repeatedly go in and out. Each day ends and night begins. Winter ends and spring begins. It is automatic and predictable. The same holds true for our life’s seasons and cycles. Childhood ends, adolescence begins, it then ends, and adulthood begins from young adult to middle age to old age. Relationships end and new relationships begin. Careers end and new ones begin. I ended my career path in the US to begin a new one in Nigeria. People love celebrating beginnings, such as, a birth, new jobs, or new relationships. Yet endings are resisted with everything done to delay their endings.

The focus becomes the difficulty of starting something new. I was passed up for a promotion and asked to train the person brought in. This ended my upward mobility within the organization. I was angry, frustrated, and sad that they thought I was not good enough to be considered for the position. I delayed the end by asking to be interviewed to demonstrate my capability which I really had already shown. I got the interview but still did not get the position. They wanted the male candidate to be in the position which I knew. I then began looking at a new beginning by leaving the current toxic organization. I asked to be considered for an international assignment in Nigeria which was a new direction for the company and me. I got my new beginning!

Emotional anxieties like anger, frustration, and sadness bring feelings of unworthiness, not being enough, and believing that success, love, and securing meaningful work can never be realized. The results are lost opportunities throughout your life because of your choice to stay stuck, scared, and broken. It is especially painful when something ends that you wanted to continue like a lost job or spouse. If you are in control over the end and the new beginning, you may feel there is less of a loss. It still sucks! It is important to feel and understand the pain of it ending because there is a lesson for you within the pain. But you are not meant to stay stuck in the pain. You should be comfortable in knowing that you are an important part of the magnificent scheme of God’s creation and the nature of beginnings and endings. Embrace it!

To get more comfortable with the emotional pain of ending any situation or relationship and easing that pain, you must be aware, understand, and expect the opportunity that can come. But you must decide and choose to get to know, realize, and seize your opportunity. Caterpillars spin a cocoon around their body which normally would be certain death! They are letting go of the only life they have ever known just as you must do. Theirs was a life crawling on the earth in search of food. For me, it was letting go of being in environments that were spinning a cocoon around me. It was becoming hard to breath. Yet if you are willing to trust the end like an earthbound worm, your new beginning will take flight into your better future. The caterpillar transformed into a beautiful butterfly and took flight. I let go of the old environment I had come to tolerate. I put all my focus on the present and built my future taking flight from the US to Nigeria into a new beginning that was unimaginable at the time.

Your focus is always driven by the pain of what has ended and what will be missed. Your world is paralyzed with your life no longer making sense. It is like everything has ended. But it is critical that you learn how to refocus during this time. Focus on the potential gain to be received from the new opportunity or in leaving a toxic situation or relationship. Reflect and focus on ALL the good and lessons learned with ending and starting something new from your past. This will give you fuel to be inspired into your growth journey. You want to grow, right? Lao Tzu said, “New Beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.” Know that an ending is not a punishment but an opportunity to change your life experience in the moment to begin a new chapter in your life. Every ending in my life brought new opportunities to learn and grow. It has led me to where I am today. Life is always changing and is what keeps life a little scary but interesting. Take ownership and lead with this. You can decide to live tied to an end, living in your past with sorrow and pain, or you can decide to let go of what is gone and start a new life. You can choose to live in your present and use it as a blank sheet of paper to create the life that will bring you happiness and joy. Trust life and believe that better things are coming. Embrace and trust the end as a new beginning, and with faith and confidence keep moving in the direction of YOUR desires! You will find greater joy, peace, strength, freedom, and fun will less stress.

It will happen in ways you would have never realized if you had remained stuck in the old. Whether growth continues throughout your life cycle is mostly up to you. You must choose how you see the changes in your life.

How will you now choose to see the endings in your life?

How will now react and behave differently when confronted

with an end in your life?

Can you grab the new


“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old,

but on building the new.” – Dan Millman

Article by: Gladys Agwai

As featured in Business Day:

43 views0 comments
bottom of page