80% of people do NOT set goals for themselves and the 20% who do set goals, 70% of them do not achieve their goals! Incredible success can take between 5-10 years of hard work. But most people give up before they see the results of their effort. Giving up on your goal takes a huge psychological and physical toll. Your stress hormone called cortisol is released and your blood pressure rises according to Psychology today. Here are some reasons you have not been able to achieve your goals:
• Overwhelmed from a lack of clarity setting vague or unrealistic goals. Another key reason for not achieving your goals is your belief that you do not have the resources required for success. But are you accessing the resources you already have? Dr. Monica Johnson, Psychologist, has a list of nine resource categories available to you ‘now’ no matter who you are. Everyone has their own internal strengths that can be utilized to help you build a life of meaning, joy, peace, strength, and happiness. Even if you grew up in a toxic environment you have access to a set of survival resources that you must reframe to help you thrive and not be lessened!
• Sabotage your efforts out of a fear of failure.
• Lack passion and motivation because you do not see the value in your goal.
• Lack confidence in your abilities.
• Believe outcomes are determined by external factors over your own power.
There are internal and external resources within each of the nine resource categories. Once you tap into them it will help you feel stronger, more capable, creative, and safe with an overall sense of peace. They work in concert with each other so that gains in one of them will bring about expansion in others.
1. Relational focuses on your ability to value and relate to others. Believe that others can be supportive and that you value, deserve, and give that level of support. Your external focus is on having diverse personal and professional relationships.
2. Somatic is in your body where you carry your stress and trauma. When you do not take care of yourself physically, your body, mental, and emotional health breaks down. Internally it is good health, breathing, mobility, sensual and sexual activities. Externally would be things like a doctor or personal trainer. All senses should be pleased.
3. Emotion gives you the capacity to experience and embrace passion, joy, contentment, and peace. But you must also regulate, communicate, and balance your negative emotions to guide your actions in ways that bring positive outcomes. Your external resources involve what gives you emotional support, like, pets, friends, family, or activities.
4. Intellectual leverages your capacity to think things through, problem solve, be creative, cognitively be stimulated, and take pleasure in learning. Your external resources could be learning institutions, workshops, brain games, or books.
5. Creative includes your ability to access the creative process within yourself through things like dance or writing. The goal is not perfection but self-expression and enjoyment. External creative resources include sharing your creative activities with others, taking lessons, or attending shows.
6. Material includes your ability to create financial security or enjoy material things like your home. External resources are any supplies that you may need in your life. If your resources are scarce right now, start small and meaningful.
7. Psychological includes your internal ability to reflect on your behavior, thoughts, or emotions, self-esteem, being non-judgmental, a sense of competency, and a sense of being okay. External resources include having access to a life coach, self-help books, or support groups.
8. Nature includes your ability to appreciate and connect with nature and all its sights, sounds, and smells. This can be enjoying a picnic or gazing at the stars. External resources include mountains, lakes, trails, or anything else you find delightful.
9. Spiritual includes your ability to connect to your spiritual guide or faith. External resources include participation in spiritual communities like your church or mosque, family prayer, or group ceremonies.
How can you leverage these resources to position yourself better to achieve your goals? Review the above information, write down the actions you must take, i.e., resources needed, current resources, plan to deepen or expand them, and how they help you. Notice any negative beliefs that come up, understand, and reframe them to achieve your goals.
“Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.”
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