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  • Writer's pictureGladys Agwai

WHY YOU WANT THE CHANGE, BUT DO NOT WANT TO CHANGE!



“God provides the wind, but man must raise the sales.” St. Augustine


I answered the phone and heard “I quit my job and I do not have another job lined up.”

She was working long hours in a job she did not like, a company that did not align with her chosen career path while traveling every week causing her to spend too much time away from her family and what really mattered. When she was with her family, she thought about

work. When she was at work, she thought about family. She was constantly in a state of conflict. Because of her load, she believed she could not do anything toward making any changes for a better

life. She was always too exhausted and overwhelmed to focus the time. She had wanted to make a complete career change for the last six years, but life kept happening – pregnancies (3), husband health issues, financial concerns. She had wanted the change but scared to make the changes required to change!!! She had a greater fear of the unknown not having “all” of the information to be “certain” of success.


What do you want to change in your life, business, or career but feel you cannot change? Is it a personal or business relationship? Do you want to go back to school to further your education, establish a business, or work your business full-time? Do you want more money, freedom, and fun with less stress? What do you need to change to make the change? Why did she decide now is the time to make a change and quit? Her problems were the same. According to Anais Nin “The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” In other words, her pain to do nothing became greater than the pain to do something. Tony Robbins speaks about how it is the avoidance of pain and gain of pleasure that are the controlling forces that will direct change for your life. You will do far more to avoid pain versus do what needs to be done to gain pleasure.


You must learn how to control how you use pain and pleasure to make decisions. A simple example is submitting a proposal or writing a book that has a deadline. You procrastinate initially

and as it gets close to the due date, the pain of not completing it and suffering the consequences becomes more painful than doing it. The late-night process of completion begins. Your FOCUS +

the MEANING you give it = Your RESULTS! Research tells us that the greatest barrier to ongoing success is not time, money, or resources. The barrier is your resistance to change and limited tolerance for risk. The world today is unpredictable and fast-paced. You will either adapt or be left behind. It is not enough to just want the change. You must decide to be committed to change. The meaning of commitment is to express a strong sense of intention and focus accompanied by a statement of purpose and a plan of action. But you must put your whole self into the commitment. Unfortunately, people partially commit to marriage and half the marriages end in divorce. Employers commit

to hiring employees, yet they are terminated. People commit to themselves, such as, New Year resolutions, weight loss, starting a business, going back to school, and saving more money never realizing the commitments made.


Problems will exist when promises are made about behaviors

and outcomes, but the process necessary to achieve those goals is ignored. You cannot just watch

your plan come through. You must fully commit and act wit the necessary routines and habits

required to see it through. Provided below are some essential techniques that will help you beyond just wanting change but achieving the change through a laser focus on how you spend

your time:


Return On Your Energy (ROe):

Investing your energy (mental, emotional, physical) on the right things require that you concentrate

your talents and abilities where they will yield the highest payoff at that moment.


Tomorrow’s Opportunity:

While you must reflect on the problems of yesterday establishing a plan to fix the problem, it is

imperative that you focus on the opportunities of tomorrow. You can increase your productivity by

leveraging your strengths, energy, and all essential resources on your major opportunities where

breakthroughs are possible. Results NOT Problems: You must Identify and achieve the key results you

expect from yourself, those you serve, and others. Understand the root problems with a focus on

getting the result.


If Not Now, When? Does it still matter?

If it is not important, there will be no motivation to get it

done. Not important CHUCK IT! Overwhelmed? CHUNK IT! The whole does not have to get done

all at once. START even if a small start! Challenge Your Fears First: Do the task that is feared the most causing the most anxiety. It puts you in present moments you do not like. In every case, you will be more efficient if the greatest emotional distress or fear is dealt with first.


Get Your Rhythm:

Get into a comfortable rhythm and begin early enough doing one thing at a time. Those who are

masters with time management and productivity leverage timers. They only focus on that one task

for that hour with minimal to no distractions allowed within their focused time. The woman who made the decision to change and not just want change, is at peace with her decision. She is more focused and excited about her future and its impact on her family and those she will touch. Her family is supportive. She determined the sacrifices she was willing to make in the meantime to have the life she for so long put aside to support everyone and everything else. Find your peace by going after, living, and being the change you desire.


“Your life does not get better with chance. It gets better with change.” Jim Rohn


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